My counselor Linda taught me a technique called the second Arrow. The first arrow is your reaction to some trigger or event that causes you to feel upset or sad or angry or any negative emotion. That's the first arrow in your heart. The second Arrow is when you beat yourself up about reacting in that way. I am a prime example of this way too often! I beat myself up because I didn't handle situation the way I would have wanted to. I get frustrated with myself if I don't act the way that I know that I should. Linda taught me that I need to drop that second arrow. The first arrow is enough! It is important to recognize your reaction, and recognize how you might be able to do better next time, but there is no need to suffer more than you already have.
I agree with her! Don't you? So, the question is then, what are we going to do it the second arrow?
Drop it like it's hot!
My therapist has some similar ideas about pain and suffering. Pain would be like the first arrow, I think, and suffering is like the second arrow.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I'm guessing you don't have the rap song stuck in your head now, right? Drop it like it's hot, drop it like it's hot...